Jessica Wolf, '08
Well, we've been back for a week now. I think I've finally developed some sort of "routine" and all my clothes are washed and unpacked. Everyone asks me about my trip—curious as to what we did and my reactions to everything we saw and did. Several people have asked me what my favorite part of the trip was. I find this question next to impossible to answer; I simply cannot choose a "favorite" part. I have also found it very difficult to describe the trip in one word. If I had to pick one word, it would probably be "amazing" or "unreal," but neither even come close to describing the trip.
Since we've been back, I've done a lot of adjusting—to the time, to a new daily routine, to not seeing the group everyday, to not hearing horns beeping constantly, to not seeing Upali, Buddika, and Ananda's faces every morning, and to not seeing the smiling faces of all the Sri Lankan people. I miss climbing up on the bus everyday, wondering what the day would hold. I miss seeing and talking to Nadee and Darshi—realizing every time I would talk to them how much different our lives are. I miss seeing the group. Every time I run into someone who went on the trip, my face lights up—as if I were reunited with a friend I hadn't seen in years. We all shared an experience that can never be repeated. And as much as we try to explain it to others, we will never be able to fully explain everything we saw or felt along the way.
I was showing my grandmother pictures in a book that I bought while in Sri Lanka. It has pictures and information of many of the places that we went to. As I was looking through the pictures with her, it seemed so "unreal." It's so hard to believe that we have actually been to those places and seen the things that the book talks about. Even when I'm telling people about the trip, it seems unreal to me—almost as if it were all a dream.
Perhaps the hardest thing (now that I'm back) will be sorting out how to make my experience the most that it can be. I don't want to eventually forget everything I learned, saw, and felt during the trip. I want to figure out some way of taking what I learned and applying it to my life. I don't want to forget all the wonderful people that we met. I don't want to say "Oh, isn't it sad that they suffered so much?" and then just keep living my life. I don't want to just feel bad for them; I want to do something to help them. I want to do all that I can to make a difference.
On the front of my journal, there is a poem entitled "Don't Quit." I had read it when I got the journal, but it didn't really have any impact. I read it again on the flight home and it was just amazing how well the poem represents the people of Sri Lanka, especially the ones that we met. Here is the poem:
"Don't Quit"
by Jill Wolf
Don't quit when the tide is lowest,
For it's just about to turn;
Don't Quit over doubts and questions,
For there's something you may learn.
Don't quit when the night is darkest,
For it's just a while 'til dawn;
Don't quit when you've run the farthest,
For the race is almost won.
Don't quit when the hill is steepest,
For your goal is almost nigh;
Don't quit, for you're not a failure
Until you fail to try.
Entry 1 - January 3, 2006 (HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!)
What an amazingly exhausting birthday! At breakfast this morning the whole group sang happy birthday to me. Once we got on the bus, I finally got to open my birthday cards that my mom and grandmother had sent with me. My mom's card made me cry (of course). My traveling buddy (Judy) and I decided we would be stand-ins for each other since she was missing her daughter and I was missing my mother.
Our first stop was beside the road to see what fish had been caught this morning. We saw a boat that had just come in; they had been out fishing all night and would probably only get around 300 rupee ($3) for their catch. One of the men in the boat told us that the tsunami had destroyed his boat (which had a motor), unlike the one he was using now. Since his other one had a motor, it could go farther out in the water. He is now worried that if they keep fishing in the shallow waters, the number of fish they will catch will be too small.
After that, we went to the Pelena School to drop off some school books and other supplies. I think the schools started back yesterday, which meant all the children were there—probably wondering what we were doing there. We went to the library to present the things we had brought. The principal and Dr. Webb exchanged words (with the help of an interpreter) and one of the little girls in the room gave thanks to us (in English) for bringing the supplies. After that, we got to walk around to different classrooms and talk to the children. One of the buildings had been completely destroyed by the tsunami and one building had the second story blown off. We showed the children in many of the classrooms where North Carolina is on the globe. John Rose also made it a point to tell everyone we met today that it was my birthday, so 2-3 different classes sang happy birthday to me. In one of the classes, there was a little boy who also had a birthday today, so they all sang to both of us. I had several kids come up to me and wish me a happy birthday.
The kids were just wonderful! They were so friendly and each one had a smile on their face. I guess smiles really are universal…and contagious at that. It was impossible not to smile around those children. Perhaps something the children loved even more than smiling, though, was getting their picture taken. They didn't know a lot of English, especially the younger ones, but it seemed as though they all knew the word "photo." Every time you took out your camera to take a picture, the children would all run to be in the picture. Then they would almost knock you down trying to see the picture on the screen of your digital camera. After playing with some of the kids on the playground, I walked around to some more of the classrooms (which are outside and basically open on 2 sides). Some kids were eating lunch, and then a group of girls from one class did a dance for some of us. What a wonderful way to start my birthday!
Madusha, a friend of Dr. Webb's, met us at the school and we all got in the bus then went to the house he is currently living in. His family's home was destroyed by the tsunami and they were living in temporary housing. One of Madusha's friends was going to Saudi Arabia and told him that he and his family could stay in their house until he returned, which was a very good thing for Madusha and his family. Now there is even a chance that Madusha's family could buy the house—which would be a great thing! We got to meet Madusha's mother, grandmother, and sisters. We also met a good friend of Madusha's, but I forgot his name.
After we left his house we went to have lunch. The restaurant had a jewelry store below it, so I decided to buy myself a birthday present…although I haven't decided whether I'm going to mention the price to my mother yet or not. While I was downstairs looking at jewelry, John Rose had told the waiters that it was my birthday, so once I came back, they sang happy birthday to me (I think I'm starting to lose count).
After lunch, our group split up. Some went with Dr. Webb to an internet café and then the rest of us went to see Sister Alex and the other sisters at the convent. We rode in tuk tuks (which are sort of like small taxis—they have 3 wheels and instead of a regular steering wheel, there are handlebars similar to a motorcycle). It was sort of scary riding in such a small vehicle with all the big buses and so much traffic. I definitely would not ride in a tuk tuk in Colombo. Sister Alex gave us a tour of the convent as well as the school that is attached to it. I think there are more children who go to that school than go to Meredith! It didn't look big enough to hold so many kids. John Rose made it a point to also tell the sisters that it was my birthday. There was no singing, but they did each give me a hug and kiss and wish me a happy birthday.
After our tour of the convent, we all took tuk tuks to Lovigahawatha. The people there are living in an old medical building because their homes were destroyed by the tsunami. Some families have 6-7 people to a room—which is smaller than my dorm room. A lot of the families also lost loved ones in the tsunami. Even though these people have experienced so much tragedy, they still greeted us with smiles. They were so friendly and inviting. Their smiles warmed your heart, and at the same time, the thought of their loss broke it. We had a party with some of the children and adults there under a tin roof shelter. Before we got started, the children all lined up and one at a time, passed out flowers or leis to each one of us. It was so sweet. Some of the children showed off their talents by singing or dancing for us. After that, Dr. Webb and Malani (the woman heading up the village) both spoke, with Prathiba being our translator. After that, we passed out food for the kids. While we were passing out the food, it started to pour down rain! Everyone scrunched in under the shelter. It was craziness, but it did not stop the party! After a little while, the rain started to slack off a bit and some of the people went back to their rooms. Then, we all spent a lot of time taking pictures and exchanging addresses. I think the hard part will be trying to remember what photo goes with what address once we get back home. It looked as though the rain was going to start back up, so we decided to head back to the hotel. All the children started begging for just "one more photo." Two of the young boys followed us down the path back up to our hotel. John Rose asked them if they had ever seen red hair before; I think one of them said no, although I can't remember exactly. After we got back to the hotel, we took showers and got ready for supper. Jake, from Project Galle, came to eat with us and talk to us after supper. I didn't eat much at supper because heat makes my appetite go away. I was just about to pay for my water, when Upali and Dr. Webb came to the table and started rushing everyone away from the table—especially me. So, I got up and walked inside, but it was dark. When I walked through to the second room, the lights were off and there was a table in the middle of the room with a birthday cake (with candles) sitting on it. The hotel staff had made the cake, along with a sign that said "Happy Birthday Ms. Jesika" on it—how cute. Then, once again, I heard the birthday song.
We passed out the cake and then all sat around to hear Jake talk about how he got involved in Project Galle and what they have been doing. Jake talked about a different way of approaching the tsunami victims in which he called objectivity. He says that you can't focus on every one person's sad story –you have to take a step back and see how you can help the majority of the people. He said that you shouldn't focus on the people who slip through the cracks, but instead focus on all the people who did receive help. I wish I could write more about what he talked about, but pretty soon after he talked about objectivity, I started feeling really bad. I got really hot, and thought I was going to be sick. I was debating whether or not I should get up and leave the room, in case I did get sick. I looked across the room and saw Nicole who mouthed to me "are you okay?" I shook my head no. Then all I remember is my vision slowly going and me attempting to stand up. The next thing I knew, I was lying on the floor staring at Dr. Webb and others. I had fainted, and I'm still not too sure why. I felt really bad because I missed the rest of Jake's speech and I caused others to miss it too. I was pretty embarrassed, but I was assured that I fell very gracefully. Once I was able to get up, Sam and Allison walked me back to my room and I went straight to bed. What a way to end my birthday… There is no way I will ever be able to forget my 20th birthday.
